I Thought I Was Lazy… Until I Learned This About My Brain

Have you ever looked at your life and thought:

“I must be lazy. Everyone else seems to get things done… why can’t I?”

That used to be me.

Even though I have a background in neuroscience and years of experience working with people on behavioural change, I still found myself avoiding the very things I said mattered most to me.

It wasn’t until I started digging into the research on stress, emotion regulation, and procrastination that things began to make sense.

Why You Might Be Stuck (It’s Not Laziness)

When we’re overwhelmed by chronic stress, our brain shifts into energy-saving mode. It defaults to quick, automatic, low-effort responses (what Daniel Kahneman calls System 1 thinking). This makes it harder to engage in anything that feels uncertain, effortful, or emotionally risky.

Which includes… almost all meaningful goals.

Even small life changes—like poor sleep, flu season, or a new family schedule—can drain your mental bandwidth without you realising it. Over time, your brain quietly reroutes you toward comfort, avoidance, and short-term distraction.

Sound familiar?

The Stress-Procrastination Loop

Here’s how the research (especially by Dr. Fuschia Sirois) maps it out:

1. You’re under stress.
2. You start procrastinating as a way to avoid discomfort.
3. That lack of progress creates more stress.
4. Stress leads to more avoidance, more guilt, more negative thoughts.
5. Repeat.

This isn’t about laziness. It’s about your brain trying to survive.
But you can retrain it—with the right approach.

Why Outcome Goals Might Be Making Things Worse

A lot of people set outcome goals like:
- “Lose 10kg”
- “Get 100k YouTube subscribers”
- “Run 5km in under 25 minutes”

But these goals are often:
- Too far removed from daily life
- Unclear in the “how”
- Emotionally loaded with self-worth

And when progress is slow (which it always is), you feel worse… and quit.

Try This Instead: The Process Goal Reset

Process goals shift your focus from outcomes to actions.
They help you build momentum and regulate your emotions—especially when motivation is low.

Here’s how to use them step-by-step:

1. Name the Emotion Behind the Task

When you avoid something, ask:
What am I really feeling here?

Fearful? Overwhelmed? Pressured?
Naming the emotion reduces its power over you. This is backed by affect labeling research—simply identifying what you feel activates the prefrontal cortex and gives you more control.

2. Sort What’s in Your Control

Take out a notebook. Draw two columns:
- In My Control
- Not in My Control

Move your actions and thoughts to the first column.

3. Choose a Process Goal

Ask yourself:
- Is it important to me?
- Does it align with my values?
- Is it easily doable?

If it’s a no on any of those, shrink the step. The smaller, the better.

Example:
Outcome goal: "Build a successful online business"
Process goal: "Spend 30 mins writing content today"

4. Break It Into Ridiculously Tiny Tasks

Instead of “Make YouTube video,” try:
- Open laptop
- Open script
- Review bullet points
- Record 1 sentence

Each small win builds momentum and restores your sense of agency.

5. Actively Reduce Stress (Without a Screen)

Don’t wait for burnout to pass.
Take an intentional pause: walk, journal, stretch, breathe—off-screen.
You’ll regain cognitive resources faster this way than by mindlessly scrolling.

Final Thoughts: Lego Blocks, Not Big Bangs

Progress isn’t about making a giant leap—it’s about stacking tiny Lego bricks every day.
Forget perfect plans. Pick small processes. Build emotional endurance.

This approach helped me stop calling myself lazy—and start acting like the person I wanted to become.

It might help you too.

Try This Today:

1. Choose one goal that matters to you
2. Name how it makes you feel
3. Create a ridiculously small process goal
4. Do it—even if it feels imperfect
5. Track how you feel after

Download the Free Stress Test Tool

Check your hidden stress load using the Life Change Index.
No email required. Just science.
👉 https://www.goalsninja.com/worksheets